thenotes:

dailydot:

My quest to find the best herbal sex tea on the Internet

I’m not about to ask my doctor if Cialis is right for me—the problem, I know, is purely psychosomatic. It requires a subtler touch. Maybe something herbal. Maybe a specially blended virility tea. From the Internet.


Sadly, I am the person who wrote this.

more than anything, I’m shocked that these products actually arrive once ordered (& aren’t just a scam to con naive boner-seekers).
also, I really wish I’d’ve taken a screenshot of my facial expression as I read this. I’m guessing it was somewhere on the continuum of “amused horror” & “disgusted mirth.”

thenotes:

dailydot:

My quest to find the best herbal sex tea on the Internet

I’m not about to ask my doctor if Cialis is right for me—the problem, I know, is purely psychosomatic. It requires a subtler touch. Maybe something herbal. Maybe a specially blended virility tea. From the Internet.

Sadly, I am the person who wrote this.

more than anything, I’m shocked that these products actually arrive once ordered (& aren’t just a scam to con naive boner-seekers).

also, I really wish I’d’ve taken a screenshot of my facial expression as I read this. I’m guessing it was somewhere on the continuum of “amused horror” & “disgusted mirth.”

Let’s Make Fun Of: Anthropologie Furniture

lizgalvao:

I love to hate Anthropologie furniture. In particular, the way they stage it for their website. There’s this gross fantasy they’ve created of an art student who can afford to spend thousands of dollars on a paint-splattered flea market find. It’s like all their customers are aspiring to be Charlotte in Tiny Furniture (a loft-dwelling trust fund dilettante).

They’ve gone off the deep end with the juxtaposition. You know those fashion editorials every fall where models lasagned in Prada swing around street signs in Red Hook? It’s like that, but on acid. The settings are more deteriorated and the designs are more design-y. It’s like shopping from deep within Fuck Your Noguchi Coffee Table.

If you choose to purchase a piece of Anthropologie furniture, it will only really look right in one of three settings:

image

1. An alternative gallery space six weeks from opening

image

2. An urban cabin with faulty electrical wiring

image

3. A crumbling Southern plantation (soon to be deemed “the new loft” by the NYTimes)


Let’s take a stroll through the Anthropologie furniture section together. What’s for sale today?

Read More

I didn’t realize how much I needed to read a takedown of stupid overpriced bullshit, but I did, & you probably do too. click that “read more,” stat.

bg5000:

Welcome to the only game in town.

ugh.

bg5000:

Welcome to the only game in town.

ugh.

songs4lyf:

Toots and the Maytals - Pressure Drop

this may be my favorite song of all time.

(via rafi602)

stele3:

Ferguson Police have dogs and shotguns. The unarmed crowd is raising their hands.

For anyone not following the Mike Brown story on Twitter: a 17 year old black boy named Mike Brown, who was supposed to start college tomorrow, was shot to death in Ferguson, Missouri by police while jaywalking. He was unarmed. He was shot 9 times.

Initial media reports claimed that an 18 year old black man had been shot and killed while fleeing police after shoplifting.

People in the neighborhood, including members of Mike Brown’s family, came out of their homes and began to protest, shouting “no justice, no peace,” and keeping their hands in the air.

Media reports claimed that a violent mob quickly formed around the shooting location shouting “kill the police.”

Spread this. Tell the truth about what happened to this boy. Tell the truth about what is happening NOW. The police and the mainstream media is painting him as a criminal, and his community as a violent mob.

SPREAD THIS. Don’t let them lie.

get it the fuck together, St. Louis.

(Source: whatwhiteswillneverknow, via oxfordcommas)

emilygould:

betterbooktitles:

Donna Tartt: The Goldfinch
Reader Submission: re-title by the great Maris Kreizman, creator of Slaughterhouse 90210
Follow @DanWilbur on Twitter
Check out How Not to Read

This is very accurate and I mean that as an endorsement of this book, which I loved. 

finally finished The Goldfinch & am reading everything the internet has to say about now that I have no fear of spoilers. this is perfect. Theo is The Boy Who Lived!!

emilygould:

betterbooktitles:

Donna Tartt: The Goldfinch

Reader Submission: re-title by the great Maris Kreizman, creator of Slaughterhouse 90210

Follow @DanWilbur on Twitter

Check out How Not to Read

This is very accurate and I mean that as an endorsement of this book, which I loved. 

finally finished The Goldfinch & am reading everything the internet has to say about now that I have no fear of spoilers. this is perfect. Theo is The Boy Who Lived!!

mattpayton:

Nation’s Gratuitously Sexual Couples Announce Plans To Wait In Line At Six Flags - The Onion

this is so real.

okay, wow.

(Source: totallytasmia, via thisspinsterlife)

a-spoon-is-born:

Good morning Baaaltimoooorreee (idek what a Baltimore is. sometimes I forget the existence of Maryland. I never even saw Hairspray.)

Baaaaaltimooooooreeeee

I’ve totally heard that before, but for some reason every time she says “Oriole baseball,” all I can hear is “Oreo facebook,” & nothing will fix it.

(also, I own that poster that starts the slideshow, & since I’ve been away from home for nearly three weeks, seeing it made me very happy.)

davidtennantssideburns:

"the wildly regretful parent who accidentally cosplayed Doctor who"

I’m neither a cosplayer nor a con-goer, but I can’t not reblog Sexy Future Doc Brown.

(Source: dorkly.com, via babyslime)